Articles by Associated Nudity

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Dick Madonna

“I've only been with 11,000 women, give or take a few hundred. I promise.”

A new biography of the film star Warren Beatty claims that he has been to bed with 12,775 women. The author adds, usefully, that the figure ‘does not include daytime quickies, drive-bys, casual gropings, stolen kisses and so on’.

Some people may need a little help to picture 12,775 different women.

The total population of Beaconsfield is 10,679, which means that Warren Beatty would have had to sleep with every single person in Beaconsfield, and even then he would have to pop in on a number of outlying villages before he had met his obligations and clocked up the remaining 2,096. Read the rest of this entry »

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PLYMOUTH, UNITED KINGDOM– COPS are hunting a pervert who smelt a supermarket worker’s BUM at least 20 times. (Video after the jump.) Read the rest of this entry »

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Lusty Lady Theatre

The place for live nude entrepreneurs.

SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA– When dancers at San Francisco’s Lusty Lady turned the exotic club into an egalitarian co-op, they found it tough to reconcile their lofty ideals with the aesthetic realities of the sex trade.

One of the first things the dancers did was to toss out rules about maintaining the same body type as the day they were hired, and ones regarding height-weight proportion. A list of acceptable hair colors was scrapped, along with a policy regulating the quantity and location of tattoos. Read the rest of this entry »

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Boobs of Mass Destruction

It was the first image that came up on the search string “Boobs of Mass Destruction”

LONDON, UNITED KINGDOM-– Agents for Britain’s MI5 intelligence service have discovered that Muslim doctors trained at some of Britain’s leading teaching hospitals have returned to their own countries to fit surgical implants filled with explosives, according to a report from Joseph Farah’s G2 Bulletin.
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Yes, dear readers, why should we discriminate against the plant world? Those horny cantaloupes need their erotic stimulation too.

My what a lovely pair...

My what a lovely pair...

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It's a bird! It's a plane! No! It's Superdick!

It's a bird! It's a plane! No! It's Superdick!

NEW YORK, NEW YORK–Drawers and jaws were dropping all over town Sunday, just as fast as the bitter winter temperatures.

It was the ninth annual No-Pants Day on the city subway and practical jokers of all shapes, sizes, and underwear types joined in the gag.

Passengers who didn’t know about the tradition were stunned. Some giggled and others stared. (Video and gallery after the jump.) Read the rest of this entry »

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The Moaning Lisa of love dolls

“Hey, big boy, how'd you like to oil my gears?”

LAS VEGAS, NEVADA– Men have often dreamed it, but it hasn’t become a reality until today: the sex robot. Developed by Douglas Hines of True Companion, an electrical engineer and computer scientist who formerly worked in the artificial intelligence lab at AT&T Bell Laboratories. Roxxxy, the sexy bot, is a completely anatomically correct and customizable companion (from features to hair color) that exhibits different personalities and responds to touch. (Gallery and video after the jump)
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Former Miss Universe Jennifer Hawkins

Jennifer Hawkins in all her naked glory

AUSTRALIA– Miss Universe 2004 and model Jennifer Hawkins agreed to pose nude and un-airbrushed on the cover of February’s Australian Marie Claire, but some are slamming the magazine’s anti-Photoshopping efforts, claiming Hawkins does not represent real women.

Editor Jackie Frank told The Australian that the images were inspired by a survey of 5500 readers, which showed that only 12 percent of women were truly happy with their bodies. Marie Claire put Hawkins on the cover to make a positive statement about body image and the photographs of Hawkins will be auctioned later this month, with the proceeds donated to the Butterfly Foundation, an eating disorders support group. Read the rest of this entry »

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Here we have some pictures of Disney/fairy tale vixens as drawn by J. Scott-Campbell and colored by Bakanekonei. They have earned themselves our nomination as the official artists of Naked Circus for their heroic efforts to sexualize our childhood. Read the rest of this entry »

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Despite what the video itself claims, the song is not by The Arrogant Worms. Which does not make it any less amusing.

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